Sunday, 21 June 2009

Happy Fathers' Day & New Beginnings

Happy Fathers' Day to all the dads out there. My own is a truly wonderful chap and I'm very lucky to have him as a father. I probably appreciate this all the more because I remember the night of his plane crash (so many years ago) so clearly. R is a fab dad with four great sons and has a mantlepiece filled with amusing and thoughtful cards.

On Friday evening I went to J's Leavers' Mass, and for some reason expected it to be the usual school event (sort of like a Parents' Evening). Obviously I hadn't grasped the true meaning behind it, and it was whilst we were in the church and the service began that I realized (call me slow) that this was it. J was no longer at school. He has been at the same school for the past fourteen years, and I can clearly remember the initial interview - where he knocked off various bits and pieces from the headmaster's desk and I was mortified - through the years where despite his parents divorcing, moving home a couple of times and various other trials of life, the school, it's teachers and his friends have been a constant area of support both to him as a pupil, and to me, knowing that he had these people around him.

I had to concentrate on not getting too emotional during the service, and managed it for the most part (the vanity of not wanting to have red eyes, and knowing I'd have to speak to people after the service helped). Then it was up to the school gym for a buffet, speeches (so funny), photos of the boys on a large screen and their comments (again, hilarious), and then presentations where each pupil received a silver plaque commemorating being in the Class of 2009. I ended up having a wonderful evening, filled with laughter and catching up with other parents I've known for years. I then returned home to S and the television, and J went off with his friends to have fun.

Sigh. My boy has grown up. I can't help getting choked by the thought that the past fourteen years has gone by so fast, too fast. When did that happen? In September he's off to Uni (assuming his grades are what he hopes they will be) and I'll have to get used to not seeing him for weeks at a time.

Right, that's enough feeling sorry for myself. I'm off to make a cup of tea and carry on reading Molly's Millions. It's wonderful.

22 comments:

Lane said...

It's like the end of an era when our children finish schools isn't it. Where do the years go?

JJ Beattie said...

WOW. Those school years are whizzing by for us too.

SueG said...

I'm going through the same thing now with my youngest. It's so hard, isn't it? Also because it means a change in our lives, too, doesn't it? I've managed to hold back my tears for now, but when i drop him off at Uni at the end of August, I know I'll be a puddle of tears.

Debs said...

lane - they seem to have gone by far too fast for my liking.

jj - it's quite sad really.

sueg - I shall be the same. I've no idea how I'm going to hold it together, but I'm going to have to some how. Gulp!

gaelikaa said...

That's a lovely post - we do get sentimental when we realise how fast time flies.

B said...

Lovely post. Thank you for sharing.

MelRox said...

lovely post!

Anna said...

oh it's a funny one is time, ending and twisting and suddenly...

gone!

a cuppa and a good book, there you are. hugs are sent, as you send that lad off. it's an amazing feeling, knowing your child is starting his own life!

Troy said...

Gosh, reading this, I realise that I'll be going through the same thing in 10 years time. It is frightening how quickly time flies, isn't it? I bet it doesn't seem 10 years since your son was 8 years old (or does it?).

Debs said...

gaelikka - we do. I think it's because most of the time we're in blissful ignorance at how time is flying by, and then when we get a reminder, it comes as a bit of a shock.

b - thanks.

melrox - thanks.

anna - thanks for the cyber hugs. I'm being very positive in front of J as I want him to be as excited for this next stage of his life as possible. I'll be fine once he's gone and I get used to it all.

troy - it feels so recent that he was that naughty little boy, and hating having to go off to school.

ChrisH said...

I liked the way you combine memories of the past with appreciating what you have now and then looking forwards to the future. Best to J for the next step.

Amanda said...

What a beautiful post, Debs :-)

gaelikaa said...

Thanks a lot for dropping in, Debs. And kurtis are for everyone, not just the teens. I'm 46 and I wear them....

Carol said...

Wonderful post hon!! End of one chapter and the beginning of a new one....and you will probably see him more than you think....he'll be back, scruffy mates in tow, dumping truck loads of washing on you and then eating you out of house and home :-)

C x

Faye said...

Ditto other commenters, Debs. This post is so, as Lane would say, "atmospheric". Loved the recognition of your Dad. And, congratulations on steering the boy through his first big passage. How exciting to think that you're sending him off to prepare for adulthood. Don't worry about missing him--just buy only limited amount of clothes for the Uni trunk so he'll have to come home often to do laundry!

Debs said...

chrish - thanks for the wishes, I shall pass them on to J.

amanda - thanks m'dear.

gaelikka - that's good to know, I think they're lovely.

carol - teehee, that made me laugh, and is probably very true too.

faye - ahah, now I know what to do. Only let him pack a few items of clothing!

Ladybird World Mother said...

Oh, how I hate endings! Glad that your son's leaving service and evening was such a good one... and that you didnt end up with the red eyed look. So attractive I find.
Molly's Millions, eh... must get it, it looks good. XX

Chad Aaron Sayban said...

It really is scary how fast the time with children goes by. Mine are still little and yet I look back at pictures from when they were younger and it already is feeling like a blur.

Debs said...

lwm - it was a close run thing.

You'll enjoy Molly's Millions, I'm loving it.

chad aaron sayban - it is scary, I'm a little taken aback by it all.

motherx said...

Yes time is flying by at an alarming rate...you are lucky to have a great father. To be honest I completely forgot...oops dog house!

Karen said...

I hardly ever dare cry these days - it takes my face a week to recover!! My daughter has just got her first proper grown-up full-time job and I felt very choked up waving her off in her little car first thing yesterday morning.

I must get hold of that book by the way(the one with the same idea I'd had for my next novel!!) and give it a whirl :o))

Debs said...

motherx - He is a great chap, and I'm very lucky to have him.

If he didn't notice you forgot, don't say anything.

karen - crikey, I can't imagine him going out to work, let alone driving. So strange for us when they become adults too.

It is a lovely book. Such a pain that it's the same idea as yours, although if told in a totally different way, it should be fine, shouldn't it?